Subject: SCOTTISH
MODERN MATHEMATICS PAPER 2005
DRAFT HIGHER GRADE MODERN MATHEMATICS PAPER 2005
HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL
GLASGOW REGION
Name............................................
Nickname.......................................
Gangname.....................................
1. Shuggie has bought half a kilo of cocaine for large. He wants to
make 300% on the deal and still pay Mad Malky his 10% protection money.
How much must he charge for a gram?
2. Wee Davie reckons he'll get £42.50 extra Marriage Allowance
a week if he ties the knot with Fat Alice. Even if he steals the ring,
the wedding will cost him £587. And he'll have to start buying
two fish suppers at £3.95 each every night instead of one. How
long will it be before Davie wishes he'd stayed single?
3. When Rangers play Celtic, their fans sing The Sash every 10 minutes
when they're winning and every 15 minutes when they're losing. How
many times did they sing it at last season's Cup Final?
4. Joey and Davie stole a 1999 green Toyota 1600GL with 35,000 on
the clock  and got a grand for it. How much more would they have
got if it had been metallic silver, done 29,000 miles and had low
profile tyres?
5. Jake the Flake and Fingers got grassed up for dealing speed. The
Flake got 18 months but Fingers got 3 years. How many more
previous convictions did Fingers have?
EXTRA CREDIT: Who was Fingers' Brief?
EDINBURGH / BORDERS REGION
Name...........................................
Rugby Club..................................
Daddy's Company.........................
1. Gavin has a spare ticket for Julian Clary at The Festival Fringe.
But Benji and Adrian BOTH want to go with him. How long does he
cry before giving them the tickets?
2. Half of Peter's friends say that they went to school with Ewan
McGregor. Another third say they were Gordon Brown's flat mate
at University. A sixth say that their dad played rugby with Tony
Blair's dad and the rest say Sean Connery was their milkman.. Only
one is telling the truth, so how many friends does Peter have?
3. Todd wants to be a lawyer, but is as thick as Edinburgh Castle.
His daddy is a Freemason and a QC. How long before Todd becomes
the Lord Advocate?
5. Princes Street is 2467 yards long. On average, there is someone
begging for money every 195 yards. You walk at 3.1 miles an hour.
How long will it take if you tell them all to sod off and work for
a living?
HIGHLANDS REGION
Name...................................
Glen.....................................
Clan .................................
1. After Hector's death, Archie has to pay Death Duty on Glenbogle.
With 25,000 acres, Archie must pay £1.76 for the first 15,000
acres and 90p per acre for the remainder, including VAT. How many
people actually give a toss?
2. An AfroAmerican called Zachary Obisanjo Kokobobo asks a Tartan
Shop in Inverness if he has any Scottish Geneaology. How long does
it take to flog him full Highland dress and matching kilts for his
wife and 10 kids?
3. If an Aberdeen supporter laid every sheep in Grampian Region
end to end, how many people would be surprised?
4. If you caught a Loch Ness Monster 115 feet long and each foot
weighed 27lbs, how much money would you make by selling your exclusive
story and pictures?
Sorry, question 5 has been delayed by heavy snowfall and will be
here as soon as the Cockbridge  Tomintoul road reopens in the
spring .
Wee Jimmie's exam answer
